A Note from Chris Adams: When became a mom, I intended to be the perfect mom. Many mole hills became mountains they never should have been, and I wasted a lot of time worrying about things that never happened. Would I do it differently if I did it now, with what I learned those years? Of course! But we only get one chance. As a leader, you can help moms face worries by voicing them and then turning them over to God. Read this post by Deb Douglas, Minister to Women, First Baptist Church, Bossier City, LA, as we continue this series on ministering to moms.
By Deb Douglas
If we drew out our mental picture of a mom, would it include a skinny woman with frazzled hair, wearing a cross body diaper bag, a baby in a sling around her, 2 other children pulling at her arms, and a dog nipping at her heels? Or would it be more like all the fun YouTube videos of moms in yoga pants dancing and singing to popular songs. The reality is, moms come in all sizes, shapes, and ages. The problems facing moms are as varied as the number of moms.
What are moms worried about? Everything! Moms worry about the traditional issues of “Can we afford college for all these kids?” “Will my child marry well?” “How can I keep my child safe?” But there are some new areas of worry for moms today:
- Stress. Will my child remember me as being stressed out or will he remember the sweet times we shared cuddling up on a rainy day?
- Pornography. Is my child being exposed to pornography? This is a tough one because unfortunately, the answer is probably yes.
- Mean Girls. Is my child being bullied by mean girls? Girls and boys are both targeted by mean girls, and it is happening at younger ages.
- Finances. How are we going to afford to keep our children on the same level as their friends? From ridiculously expensive birthday parties to elaborate trips during spring break to being on the right sports team, raising children is expensive today if keeping up with the crowd is a priority.
- Friends. What’s happening when my children are at their friends’ homes?
- Religious intolerance. Is my child being excluded because of our religious beliefs?
- Uncertainty. What will the world look like when my child becomes an adult?
As women’s ministry leaders, understanding what moms are stressed and worried about can prepare us to help them thrive in their roles. Intentionally scheduling small group time, retreats, or events for moms to share and talk will add to the understanding.
Another suggestion is to have a Mom Talk, an informative coffee time for moms to brainstorm about being a mom. Either meet at a local coffee shop one evening, or gather at the church for coffee, cookies, and chatting. Have questions ready to start the conversation and then listen! Have someone take notes for you to analyze later. Use what you learn to craft events and choose Bible studies to meet the needs of moms. End the talk time with encouragement and prayer!
Need help with starter questions? Try these:
- What keeps you awake at night? What worries haunt you?
- What’s the biggest challenge your family is facing today?
- Mean girls and bullies are a hot topic. How is this impacting your family?
Moms and worrying go together, but we as women’s ministers can come to the rescue and stop those worry warts!
Dr. Deb Douglas is the minister to women at First Baptist Church, Bossier City, La., and a LifeWay Ministry Multiplier, launched her first women’s Bible study at the age of 20. Her passion is encouraging and equipping women to serve. She is also a freelance writer and contributed to Transformed Lives: Taking Women’s Ministry to the Next Level, Revised & Expanded. Deb graduated from New Orleans Baptist Theological Seminary with a Masters of Arts of Christian Education/Women’s Ministry and a Doctor of Education in Ministry degree. She is the wife of Paul, mom of Jared and Katie, mother-in-law to Emily and Jacob, and grandmother to Caroline.