Often I am asked how I balance life, ministry, family, church, etc, etc. First of all, let me tell you, I DO NOT HAVE BALANCE, at least not most of the time. But I do seek healthy balance of all God has given me to do on a daily basis. Some days are better than others! And some seasons are more stressful than others.
I’ve written on balance and burnout a number of times on this blog: check out this, this, and this post.
5 Ways to Not Grow Weary (written by Jennifer Landrith)
First of all, God is not ONE part of the balance, HE is the foundation and I seek to make sure I know He is a part of ALL my responsibilities. Second, I realize that the ministry God has given me includes primarily my husband, then my children and grandchildren. I cannot separate those relationships from my relationship and assignment from God.
So, if you are married let me ask you to assess something: where does your husband fall in your daily focus? If he only gets the left-overs after you have accomplished your ministry tasks for that day, what does that tell him about how you view him?
I struggle with this just like you do, but I want more than ever to focus on my marriage in the midst of life! SO here are some things I try to do on an ongoing basis:
- Pray for God to make our marriage stronger year after year.
- Pray specifically for my husband daily, using Scripture and focus on areas where he struggles.
- Seek to say uplifting things about my husband in front of others, realizing it blesses others to see how he and I love each other.
- Take time away (out of town, away from the house) to just be with him.
- Compliment and thank him for the big and little things he does for me daily.
- Seek his prayers and support as I speak to and teach women.
- Verbally tell him I love him, several times a day.
- Tell him goodbye when I leave (or her leaves) as though I might not see him again. (His 20 years as a Texas state trooper taught me this one!)
Here are some more ideas:
BUT what if you are in a difficult marriage while serving in ministry?
Know that you are not alone! Many women serving and leading in ministry do not have husbands who are strong spiritual leaders. Keep praying for him and know that God is as work.
As long as your husband is not opposed to the time you spend serving, do it wholeheartedly, but also give to your marriage wholeheartedly. If you resent his attitude about your serving, it may draw him away instead of toward Christ.
And of course, I can’t end this post without stating what you already know…seeking balance begins with your time with the Lord daily, in His Word, praying, listening… then leaving your prayer closet to face the day in His power and watching for His assignments.
Perfect balance? That’s a myth! Seeking balance? That’s a daily journey with Christ.
Resources for Balance:
A Place of Quiet Rest, Nancy Leigh DeMoss
Margin, Richard Swenson
Freedom from Busyness, Michael Zigarelli
Surrender, Nancy Leigh DeMoss
The Frazzled Female, Cindi Wood
Victoriously Frazzled, Cindi Wood
Resources for Marriage:
Devotions for a Sacred Marriage, Gary Thomas